Where I Briefly Look Up From My New iPhone to Rant and Rave

Last night at Walgreen's I was accompanied by just four of my children. We were waiting in the checkout line when the jolly lady behind me boomed - quite loudly - "Wow! TWO GIRLS AND TWO BOYS! ARE YOU DONE?"

Well, sheesh. I get asked this question all the time, and really, I don't usually mind it. I'm happy to talk about it with friends, or even acquaintances.  And I know I'm supposed to roll my eyes and say "Of course I'm done...these kids are killing me."  But...really?  Do I need to answer this in front of the entire checkout line and cosmetics area at Walgreen's?  Why doesn't she ask the woman next to me with two children if SHE's done?  Just because I have an extra kid or two...this gives other the right to publicly inquire about something that is a rather personal question?

And then at Target:  an older man behind us in the checkout line, observing my five in various stages of freneticism:  "Are they all yours?"  And then, visibly shaken:  "How are you going to pay for COLLEGE?"  Well, for freak's sake.  Again:  is that any of your business?   I don't KNOW how we're going to pay for college.  We will figure it out, somehow.  Maybe I'll go back to being a CPA.  Maybe I'll write a book about people who feel it's just fine to make probing inquiries of people with large families.  Maybe I'll become the world's oldest pole dancer.

But since when does our society view children as mere liabilities, as if they were walking around with a 6-figure cloud hanging over their heads?  Did THIS guy's parents view him as just another debt, another burden?  Is this why most people these days only have a few kids - because they're worried about college? 

Yes, children can be expensive.  But to view them only as half the balance sheet, rather than the blessings - ASSETS - that they are cheapens us all. 

I wish I could have come up with this comeback:  "Well, I don't know how we're going to pay for college.  But I do know that my husband I am slogging it out with these kids, day in, day out, in the hopes that we will raise responsible, competent, kind adults WHO WILL PAY FOR YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY SHOULD YOU MAKE IT THAT LONG, YOU OLD GRUMP!"

OK, OK, maybe not the last part.