Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Irritants


It's bathroom cleaning day.


I have gained 14 1/2 pounds during this pregnancy. The baby weighs about 10 ounces. Apparently my arse weighs 140.


The dog threw up a rock this morning. What dog eats a rock?


Some store wench at the mall wouldn't let my three year old use the bathroom in her store. She insisted I had to walk 4 miles to the other end so my kid could pee. Really?

I think my daughter drank water from the dog's bowl. I am trying not to think about this.


Yesterday a woman came up to me and looked at my leg, saying, "Oh, I have a friend that happened to! She had to hire help during her last trimester because she couldn't WALK!" Super!


I carefully purchased and planned my sister's birthday present to arrive right on her birthday. It arrived right on her birthday...to my own house. I had shipped it to myself.


My ATM card has been lost, and I have to somehow scrounge up $3 for my son's field trip to Chik Fil A. This is a lot harder than it sounds.


My older son is first on the waiting list for the Chinese Immersion program at his elementary school. I am obsessing about this. Someone needs to move away.


There are only eight days left in the school year.


...I am rather lucky that these are the great conundrums of my life, aren't I?


(Sorry about the picture. I am going to lose 18 readers for posting such grossness.)

10 comments:

Beth Gales said...

Totally hilarious, you need to write a book :)

Logical Libby said...

I once shipped a Christmas present to my old address. I hadn't lived there in two years. And I couldn't blame
pregnancy.

So, go easy on yourself.

kforbes said...

I did the same thing with my mom's b-day gift. when we lived in Atlanta...I actually opened it thinking it was a surprise gift for me. I wasn't pregnant.

The mad woman behind the blog said...

Okay, your foot is sort of creeping me out.

And yes, I've been there, trying to scrape together a couple of bucks sans ATM. Its a bitch!

Sounds like a pretty normal life, if you ask me!

Leslierush said...

My dog eats rocks...and sometimes my youngest likes to dip his plug (aka binky) into the dog water and then plop it back into his mouth.

MCW said...

OMG. You poor thing! Tomorrow is a new day :)

janek said...

Jill - What happened to your foot? obviously its because of pregnancy?? oh - I'm so sorry - that does look painful. ugh.

Scientific Housewife said...

You poor thing, I hope your foot gets better!

Tori said...

I'm so happy I came across your blog. You put a hilarious spin on everything and I always look forward to and enjoy reading.
Oh~I do hope you feel better. I won't even say get some rest because I know with four kids it's impossible!

MisAdventuresofMomof3 said...

Hahaha! Jill - it's Fiona. Too funny about the money! If you had seen me (I was raiding piggy banks) Why?!?! I couldn't find $3 either. I sent Naomi with quarters...and prayed she wouldn't lose them between the car and the door. What if she lost one? I didn't think I could find a replacement!!